Spontaneity at its best (Journal Entry #001)

So yesterday, I was on my way to a training… Getting up was harder than usual that morning and I don’t know – there’s this heavy feeling all of a sudden. I told myself, “Fuck it! I’m ditching this… this day is mine and I’m gonna live it the way I want to… I’m going to break the boring cycle today and I’ll just do as I please.” and so I did. I was off to my own little adventures. I randomly rode some train and randomly got off as well. It’s nice to be lost…with nothing but the maps-app on my phone…I just walked aimlessly and went where my feet would take me…

My first stop was at a random church. I felt the need to reconnect with God, somehow I feel that I’m starting to drift away. I went in, hoping that doing so would bring me closer to him… I poured my heart out, clasped both my hands and kneeled in prayer. I told him all my woes and worries, all my hopes and dreams… and asked him for guidance. I left… only to find myself again on another church – my next stop: San Sebastian. I did the same… I talked to him like I’ve never talked to him before… I prayed and prayed to pass the UPLAE. I stayed there for quite some time…meditating while admiring the interiors of the place… and then, off I went… to the place I intend to go to that very morning: Manila City Hall Regional Trial Court. You know how inclined I am at the moment, in Law… and my adventures wouldn’t be complete without visiting something related to it… I sauntered the hallways, looked at every rooms corresponding the different RTC branches. Trial rooms were locked. I interviewed staffs and found out that hearings usually took place during mornings. Mission Failed! I haven’t witnessed one. What I was hoping for was that I’d be inside the courtroom. Well, enough with frustrations. You know me enough…I wouldn’t stop there. I searched the location of Court of Appeals and again… I’m off. However, I got a bit distracted. I saw a sign pointing towards National Planetarium and just like that, I went in. I paid, registered and settled myself on a seat while waiting for the dome show to begin… and well, I was so glad I stumbled to that place… As soon as the show began, I couldn’t contain my joy. A kid in me was unleashed and I gaped at the dome with all enthusiasm. It was so relaxing…as if I’m really staring into a cloudless night – but even better… and as the billion stars twinkle right above me – even though they’re just projections – I wished on the brightest of them… wished for me to be admitted at UP Law. I wished and prayed so hard – that the stars twinkle even more through my tears. After the show, I hurried to the Court of Appeals…I’ve entered various rooms, telling staffs my intention, looking for someone that would let me sit-in amidst a hearing. Sadly, just like at the RTC, there’s no more hearings to listen to for the day. Still, they gave me the schedule of the cases on the courtroom for the next 2 months. I left… but only to seek for something better : Supreme Court. At the lobby, there were reporters…something’s happening at the Session Hall. I went to the Clerk of Courts and clarified my intentions. I was very lucky a staff gave me a ticket so I can get admitted to the Session Hall. I knew I was meant to be here… There’ a reason! This is it! I’m going to witness judges and attorneys in action. I was smiling goofily, it won’t subside. I smiled even wider as I settled on the seat inside. My heart’s jumping for joy…This is the exact feeling you get when you finally found your one true love. I tried to focus  and tried stopping my mind from stirring any more thoughts. I listened intently to the oral arguments… I was amazed how eloquent they were… how sharp their minds are to be able to memorize all those laws… how firm they are on their beliefs — all traits I do not have. I envy them… their words, their sharpness, their intellect… they’re hypnotizing to watch. Deep inside me, there’s a voice…loud cries… “I want to be just like them.” I sat for hours listening to the exchange of words and the battle of their minds… The session ended but even until I got home, I’m holding a dream in my heart… a dream that’s burning with my passion… I’ve been motivated beyond words…

And someday, I will look back at this day and I will remember how this particular day ignited my love for law… how I realized being a lawyer wasn’t just my childhood dream…how I felt I was born to be in this field. Someday, I’m not just going to be an architect and a master plumber… I am going to be a lawyer… and more… More titles, more achievements… Because I wasn’t born to settle with the mediocre. I was born to soar high… I am going to be everything I ever wanted to be… There’s no  limit to what I can do and what I can attain… 

Later that night, I remembered all my perfect and almost perfect examinations during college at taxation, constitution and other subjects relating to law… And so I decided to talk to my former professor… He’s already a lawyer and I was his favorite… he always referred to me as one of the best student he ever had throughout his teaching career. When he heard about my visit to the Supreme Court and how much I’m aching to pursue this career, he was so enthusiastic. He assured me I will pass the admission test and told me something I’d never forget – “Law School is waiting for you.”

(it’s been months since I wrote this, but I retyped this just to make sure that I am not forgetting all my sentiments that day… I’d like to remind myself of my one true love… and one day, when I already have the resources, I will make this dream come true)

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